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Rest

There were many plans in 2020. To travel, to live, to do things together – all cancelled from a pandemic. But maybe it’s to make way for something we didn’t plan – to rest?

My schedule pre-COVID-19 has always been manic. Meeting friends, volunteering, church, work, travel, exercising….. I rarely have time to be home. Home is a place where I do basic necessities and host people. I spend most of my time being with other people, being together. When lockdown started in the UK back in March, I had a rough time adjusting, like many other people I suppose. but it gave me some time to do the things I never scheduled: to rest.

Finally days ahead of me where I have no schedules. Days to lay down on the sofa and enjoy a good book. Days to learn sewing because I feel like it. Days to sit down and talk with friends on the phone for hours when I don’t feel like doing anything. Days where I can just do nothing on the sofa when period fatigue hits. Nothing. Nothing. I can’t remember the last time that happened. I even get some time to be reflecting on my activities and my hectic life, and start reflecting on how they impact me. Maybe I am really doing too much, and piling too many stuff into my already crazy life.

It wasn’t an easy adjustment, I have to say. But 4 months later, I can say it did some good flushing to the system. I even start writing, contemplating about life. I feel more energetic. I haven’t got sick since March. I try to reduce my activities and start handing over so that when life goes back to normal (whenever that is), hopefully I will take some learning from 2020 lockdown and finally schedule some more downtime in this life. There are unlimited amount of things to be doing on this planet. The only question we have is which one do we eliminate. Life is never meant to be robotic, to always be moving on. Take your time to rest. Rejuvenate. Recover. Enjoy the little things in life.

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Gratefulness in the midst of Pandemic

COVID-19: the only news everyone is hearing right now. The UK is in partial lockdown now, with people allowed to be outside for the most essential needs: buying food and essentials, caring for the sick, and limited exercise for once a day It was a drastic change from me. I was out and about almost every day, at home practically for food and sleep. In less than a week, I am suddenly home practically 24 hours a day. Regardless to say it was confusing, depressing and difficult the first week, then it gets easier once I navigate the situation and learn what to do by myself. Needless to say, I was being slightly grumpy, and feeling down for a whole week.

Then I heard stories from other people: a friend who got made redundant, people who are sick, people who don’t have food, people who are financially struggling, people with mental health issues, people who can’t get enough food, homeless people who don’t have shelter…. and feeling extremely petty about myself. I have the privilege to work from home, food to eat, and shelter. I have been healthy. I have an amazing support system around me, friends and colleagues who are checking on me and taking care of me as much as they can.

One of my biggest bugbear in this life is that I seem to never have enough time. Suddenly I have lots of time to do whatever I never had the time to do! So finally, getting my sewing machine out and learning how to machine sew for the first time today, getting out and finally being ahead on my marathon running plan, and finally also updating this blog! What not to love. Extra naps are also much welcomed!

NHS is stretched – but I think this situation has raised some awareness too on the importance of NHS and key workers – the nation went on a social-media organised clap on Thursday evening. It’s not helping, at least not yet, since the NHS is still suffering, but maybe something good will come out at the end.

That’s how I cope. That’s how I see this situation. I realised that at this point probably there’s nothing I can change about the situation – but good things can still come out of it. There’s always a silver lining in everything, and gratefulness never hurts.

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2020

Hello all, I’m back.

It’s been a while since the last time I updated my blog. Just like other things in life, it was a culmination of so many factors. I was for sure tired and busy most of the time with a full time job and 2, let’s say, organisations to take care, combined with travel, moving house and a new job. But I don’t think that’s it. I think there’s more to that.

It was all about expectation.

I had high expectations about this blog. I had a target to publish weekly posts. It started with a good intentions, but unrealistic with my current schedule. I had an abstract idea about what perfection looks like, and each time I write, I ended up not publishing it because I don’t think it’s good enough. Maybe it wasn’t. Maybe it was. We all need to start somewhere. I should have just published the post.

And then there’s the technicality of me changing host without backing up the content of my blog, so I lost it all. I had a twinge about it when I found out, and at this point I’ve let it go. It’s time to start anew. New decade is here.

So I’m going back to the basics. Writing about the things I love. Catching up with loved ones. Sharing my thoughts. Expressing my thoughts and knowledge. Sharing my journey. Those are what I need to achieve through this blog, not a strict weekly writing schedule. I may ended up writing more than that, less than that, but I think I have enough things going on without being burdened more with a target that I can’t achieve in this life.

So here’s to 2020. No blogging resolutions. Just going back to the basics and learning to enjoy the journey and walk one step at a time.